The Others

You know, a lot of people are just naturally nice. They think the best of who they do and do not know and sincerely wish them well. They look for the good. They lose themselves in the service of others.

I'm not one of those people.

I wonder how I got that way. So quick to judge, to presume I know someone before I really do. Nine times out of ten I am wrong. And it goes both ways. I will prejudge someone as being good when actually they're not so much. At least as far as it pertains to me and to those I love. Some of you will know what I'm talking about.

The majority of the time when I think I've pegged someone's personality, that I know 'who they are', welp, you guessed it, I'm wrong.

BUT there are times when I hit it right on the nail.

I shouldn't be that way, I do not want to act that way. I don't want that to be my 'go to' way of thinking when I meet a person or accidentally or fatefully cross paths with one or two or how many others. It confounds me, and truthfully, I feel shameful that I've somehow let that become part of my nature.

Here's what I think. I think, (and this occurred to me while sitting in a Primary Sharing Time listening to an excellent presentation on the importance of being Christ like and building unity with others), that I spend so much time in the ME box thinking of me myself and I, that I judge others based on how I judge myself. And I don't so much like myself, and so my automatic response is to be judgmental in the bad sort of way, and think I KNOW who this person is, when I don't.

I have heard that what you don't like in others is really what you don't like about yourself. You also buy gifts for people based on what you'd like for yourself, but that is beside the point.

None of this is new, just a reminder for me to work on this problem. Change takes practice, and, I believe, a real desire. I've found for myself that prayer is about the only way I make any progress towards changing. And now I've exposed myself for the judgmental, me box thinking, unprayerful person I be. Just typing this post is indicative of who I think about most.

Dichotomy though... often I will have such an empathetic feeling towards a person that I'm physically, metaphorically speaking, touched. Also, sometimes my gut tells me what my heart doesn't or won't accept.

blahblahblah. What I really want to do is to be a better person. Th-th-th-at's all.

PICTURE TIME:

Poetry in Motion

Now, go shut the front door.